Updated: May 19
"I used to drive myself crazy every day and cry myself to sleep every night wondering if you were talking to someone else, wondering what I could be doing wrong, wondering if you even cared.
You would treat me like crap, push me away, yet I would still take you back every time, whenever it was convenient for you. Whenever you just wanted or needed something from me. I accepted your blatant lies, I made excuses for your bad behavior, I gave you chance after chance after chance.
No matter what you put me through, I didn't want to give up on you. I put up with so much because I foolishly believed that one day you would see the error of your ways and change to be the person I expected you to be. The person who actually wanted a future with me, the person who actually gave a damn about me. Sadly, I loved you so much that I lost myself waiting for you to change.
Fortunately, over time I came to realize that it wasn't my fault, that there is nothing I can do to change you. That is just who you are and always will be. I realized I fell in love with someone you just sometimes pretended to be. I realized that I deserve much more than you will ever be willing to provide. I found the strength and learned to love myself enough to leave, permanently. You taught me to no longer accept less than I deserve."